What the New Job Lingo Really Means
Thanks to my bro-in-law, Paul Tereszkiewicz, for these!
“JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY”
We have no time to train you.
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“CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE”
We don't pay enough to expect that you'll dress up; well, a couple of the real daring guys wear earrings.
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“MUST BE DEADLINE ORIENTED”
You'll be six months behind schedule on your first day.
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“SOME OVERTIME REQUIRED”
Some time each night and some time each weekend.
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“DUTIES WILL VARY”
Anyone in the office can boss you around.
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“MUST HAVE AN EYE FOR DETAIL”
We have no quality control.
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“CAREER-MINDED”
Female applicants must be childless (and remain that way).
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“NO PHONE CALLS PLEASE”
We’ve already filled the job; our call for resumes is just a legal formality.
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“SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE”
You'll need it to replace three people who just left.
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“PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A MUST”
You're walking into a company in perpetual chaos.
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“REQUIRES TEAM LEADERSHIP SKILLS”
You'll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect.
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“GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS”
Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want and do it.
Please note: This material was forwarded to me with no attribution to the actual author. If you know who created this list, please let me know so I can attribute it properly. Thanks.
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