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Alternativas Que Apoyan a los Sentimentos

por Jane Bluestein, Ph.D.

Red Square Tenga muy claro su papel. Are we there to protect children or to teach children to protect and defend themselves; to give solutions or to help them find their own?

Red Square Escuche. Maintain eye contact, with minimal or no talking.

Red Square Distinga entre los sentimientos y el comportamiento. Remember that there’s a difference between wanting to hurt someone and actually hurting someone.

Red Square Acepte el derecho que tiene la otra persona de tener esos sentimentos. This means the absence of judgmental, shocked or disappointed words, looks, body language; not making someone wrong for his or her feelings.

Red Square Valide la experience de la otra persona. Validation is anything you say or do that recognizes and respects the reality of the child's experience, and gives the child permission to have his or her feelings.

Red Square Mantenga sus límites. Let kids know when you’ll be available. Watch the tendency to take responsibility for the child’s feelings or problems by trying to fix the situation, cheer them up (fix them), or by rescuing or advising.

Red Square Provide healthy, non-hurtful outlets for feelings (and meeting needs)

Red Square Ask–don’t tell. This is for problem-solving more than dealing with feelings (affective states). Helps children find solutions to their own problems, think about options available, anticipate probable outcomes. Puts you in the role of facilitator or guide. A great alternative to advice-giving! For more information, click here.

Red Square Model and teach conflict-management. Demonstrate non-destructive ways to have, express, and process feelings; express needs; set and maintain boundaries.

¿Cómo se sintió al haber sido escuchado?

¿Cómo se hubiera sentido si no se hubiera sentido escuchado?

Excerpted and adapted from The Win-Win Classroom, by Jane Bluestein, Ph.D., (Thousand Oaks, CA: Corwin Publishing, © 2008), and Parents, Teens & Boundaries, by Jane Bluestein, Ph.D. (Deerfield Beach, FL: Health Communications, Inc., 1995). Translated by Graciela Cueva and Monet Millard Templeton, Encinitas Union School District, Encinitas, CA. Additional translation by E. Ann Worthington, Executive Director, New Hope Charitable Foundation.

Note: This is a draft version of this page. The final version may include additional translations of links that are currently in English and corrections of errors in the translation or typing that are found by proofreader.

Esta página es disponible en ingles, también.

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3 Metas Para Mantener En Mente

Beliefs that Help Create a Safe Emotional Environment

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